life happens – Stop the Stigma

This was an ad on Facebook a while ago…you know on the right hand side to catch your attention? They did a survey, (Facebook did) and mostly women click on those pesky and annoying ads. Well, to see this photo to attract mostly women, is an insult. Perhaps it was to attract the sensitive type, or maybe it was to shock the healthy type who thrives on a healthy body, not the size and shape it should be, or maybe just maybe it was to attract a vulnerable person whose self depends only on what media portrays and a fragile person perhaps, whose body mass equates to her self-worth or another person who never accepts the body he/she has been graced with.

Well, the photo angered ME because I could see how it would attract any vulnerable person and the name Dr. …. Well, it seems to endorse the article because one would think a medical professional “knows best”. You would think…(And yes, I know the doctor had nothing to do with this particular image….personally). But it’s THERE right out in the Facebook public!! So pardon me for taking a few moments to rant at my leisure.

I don’t care what the article is about! I don’t give a care why the advertisers did it…what sickens me is to see such an image to shock, hurt, attract, tease, tempt or scare anyone into reading the darn article.

Keep holding on if you are battling with an eating disorder, if you are in treatment, if you are in recovery…if you have friends or family struggling with this…tell them…to remember to keep holding on.

I’m done now. Rant terminated…for now. CL

P.S. There ARE lots of good things on social networks, here is something I liked and saw on No BODY is Perfect. https://www.facebook.com/StrongIsPretty

check this out

Here I am resting my poor allergy afflicted sinuses by taking the day off, needing very badly to rest my head on my pillow. I am feeling very listless. My body has spoken clearly and sleep/rest is what I need. Staying in a vegetated state will do for now.{smiles}

I know that I should not even think too much today…{snickers} because sometimes my brain literally hurts from contemplating on so many things. Sheesh! Thank goodness I do NOT read newspapers and rarely watch the news on t.v.!

Today I should not think of anything remotely related to my work either, such as the miseries of troubled youths, the student who has reached her limit with bullying, the girl who can no longer take the sexual abuse at home, the youth whose mom says she should have had an abortion {Ouch! That one always kicks me in the gut!}; and then the youth that has decided with nail polish remover in one hand and bleach in another that life cannot go on any longer…they have given up.

Nope, I deserve a nice break today. The rainy dank weather makes the pollen that much more potent and for some reason my sinuses seem to be a barometer that leads my body into feeling great one day or like a pile of …um…sugar…heavy bag of sugar, yeah, that’s what I meant. {smirks, eyes raised to the ceiling}.

I still had to get up to take my antihistamine and a cuppa tea was also needed. As my tea was steeping, I glanced at my laptop just sittin’ on the dining room table next to my best friend, Bette…hmmm, may as well have a look to see what’s happening…click on twitter to get snippets of news {I’m sort of a mental health, human interest junkie and I follow several major medias to get highlights of the current news issues.}

Ah, just a sneak peak…then I am tempted to check Facebook to see if my very pregnant friend has gone to hospital yet…and I notice an article another colleague posted.

Her comment caught my attention “This is such an amazing real story” and I am a sucker for true human interest stories. I read further at the quote from the article: Don`t Kill Yourself Your Dentist Will Miss You.

”There are people that would be uncomfortable ever telling you how highly or how often they thought of you and vice versa because we live in a world that eschews intimacy and affection in favor of the allegedly “comfortable” distance we choose to keep that is actually making a large portion of the population feel cripplingly lonely.” Alana M. http://xojane.com

http://m.xojane.com/issues/dont-kill-yourself-your-dentist-will-miss-you

Okay, that did it…I had to read it but first I had to pour my cuppa. {Aww, that’s better! Like the English (UK) does whenever something is troubling you, tea will sooth you everytime…it’s like listening to mommy say “there there”.}

This article brought tears to my eyes. It was so moving and yes, REAL! How misunderstood humans are who live with suicidal ideations. It isn’t as if it is a “one size fits all” symptom and then one clinical approach and one pill that can make it all go away.

It is sometimes a crippling feeling and can haunt some off and on throughout a huge part of their lives; it is a constant companion lurking in the shadows creeping out now and then to taunt a suffering soul. Some people may have experienced or had this “visitor” when suffering depression and recovered; the morbid and suicidal thoughts also lifted with recovery. Others have this feeling revisit them time and time again.

Teenagers and young adults are probably at the highest risk, being more impulsive…their brain is still developing…not quite reached its maximum growth; the ability to control impulses has not quite attained maturity. {At least now we understand that a human brain has not reached maximum maturity…the frontal lobe where impulse control is situated…and that is what is meant by “teens acting on impulse” and not always thinking things through. They often want to take back that impulsive action if they could…suicide, you can’t!}

Adolescence is exciting and fun but it is also a scary and troubling time with raging hormones, academic demands, access to too much stimulation, social networking pulling them in so many directions and trying to figure out where they fit in this world; thoughts of what they are going to do to survive once they reach adulthood keep overwhelming them.

A youth or young adult who shares they want to commit suicide is not always taken seriously. How often do we hear, “Ah, she just wants attention!” Or a young man is devastated by the breakup with his partner and threatens to kill himself. To him, life has ended. How many of you remember the pain and agony the first weeks after a breakup? And NO, it does not hurt more because you have been with your partner for 10, 20 or 30 years. It HURTS at any time PERIOD. What a younger person does not realize is that the “grief” they are experiencing is a process and in time it will hurt less. So imagine that feeling again…feel that pain the first week your lover broke your heart! Now imagine feeling like that for the rest of your life! THAT is how many youths feel they will be feeling…forever!

Suicidal ideation is not all about a breakup or a broken heart…it is often about a broken spirit…a person who says, “I don’t feel worthy breathing air on this planet” or “ I feel I am a waste of space here on earth” or “I cause too much trouble for everyone…if I leave, it will be a blessing for them.” Or “No one will miss me.” And sometimes yes, it can be the anguish one feels when surviving the death of a loved one through death…sometimes suicide. Other mitigating circumstances may contribute to these thoughts from mental illness to physical illness…sometimes a bit of both! That’s why it is so important to see a medical health professional to get “both” sides of the picture along with the real expert, the client, who knows what feels right and not so kosher.

It is never “simple” or “routine” in diagnosing a person suffering from suicidal thoughts. But FIRST, it sure helps to have someone believe the person who is suffering and to listen twice as much as talk…that’s why we have 2 ears and 1 mouth. Communication is needed so people do not feel they are alone.

I am so pleased to have found 2 amazing websites where there ARE interesting human interest stories to quench my thirst. Alana M. has an added touch to make me actually laugh out loud. I can so relate to her style of humour.

By the way, if you want to read more from this savvy and quirky writer/blogger, Alana Massey she blogs at http://ohitsjustawful.com/ Or if you want more interesting stories you can also go to the website where this article was published at xoJane, http://xojane.com which is a website where Jane Pratt is the editor in chief ( also former EIC and founder of Sassy and Jane.)